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Part 1: The Snow White Syndrome

Green with envy? Last night, I watched the newly released movie Snow White and the Huntsman. I loved it! I especially liked Charlize Theron's performance of the envious wicked Queen Ravenna. Ironically, I felt more sympathy (and empathy) for Queen Ravenna, than I felt toward Snow White. Charlize Theron truly embodied Ravenna's pain and fear of vulnerability, insecurity, anger, sorrow, competition, jealousy (and most of all), the envy that all humans experience and feel within ... VIEW POST

What Makes a “Good Mom?”

Feeling "mom guilt?" A few weeks ago, I gave a Relief Society lesson in another ward. As a counselor in my stake Relief Society presidency, a lot of my calling involves speaking (and listening) to the sisters. After my lesson, a woman took me aside and voiced her pain (no…her anguish) regarding the unrighteous choices her teenage and adult children were making. As active Church members, she and her husband tried to do all the “right things” in raising their kids. But they ... VIEW POST

How Do You Define "Niceness?"

Sugar and spice and everything nice? Growing up as a "Baby-Boomer" in the United States, I often heard the saying: Girls are sugar and spice and everything nice. Boys are snakes, and snails, and puppy-dog tails. Obviously, there was a strong expectation in American culture that girls and women should always be nice. Today, the "be nice mantra" has morphed into "Be kind," and everyone is expected to follow it. In my last post, I revealed my self-defeating mindsets in my associations ... VIEW POST

The Price of Nice

Suffering from the disease to please? What's so bad about being nice? If we're determined to be "nice" at all costs, then something's wrong---perhaps with us. In a previous post I wrote about the "Inauthentic Niceness Syndrome." In this post, I'll discuss our sincerity in trying to be nice---but often to the detriment of our own emotional well-being. Growing up in California, I was raised on the ethos of niceness. "Be nice," was a mantra in my family, in our Latter-day Saint Church culture ... VIEW POST

Are You Afraid of Your Own Greatness?

Greatness and humility can co-exist. Years ago, I read an article about poverty-stricken people who live in America's Blue Ridge Mountains. I was surprised to learn that many teenagers and young adults who were born into poverty stay there because of family pressure. Why? Wouldn't parents want their children to have a better life? Wouldn't young adults desire that for themselves? The answer is obviously yes, but only to a point. As a person attempts to work his or her way out of poverty, ... VIEW POST

Step 3 of the 12 Steps: Trust In God

Feeling unloveable? I have a dear friend who has many qualities I admire. Whenever I complimented her, she shrugged it off. When I pointed this out to her, she said, "I guess I don't believe you when you tell me good things about myself." I'm hoping she's learning to believe me. Years ago, I had a similar mindset toward God. When I felt the Spirit whisper of Heavenly Father's love for me, well, I sort of believed it. When I prayed, I felt God telling me that I was a good and acceptable ... VIEW POST

"The Ten Virgins" by John Melhuish Strudwick

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